San Antonio Roller Hockey League
Updates
Important Info
03/22/26 – Week 5
8:00PM: Czechia (H) vs Italy (A)
9:00PM: Czechia (H) vs Russia (A)
As always, check Facebook for updates and pick-up
Last site update: 03/20/26 23:54
Game Previews
Winter 2025 Season Preview
The SARHL returns to Fairchild Park with a fresh batch of teams ready to battle for dominion over the rink. With new alliances, rivalries, and personalities, the stage is set for a season of chaos, hilarity, and the occasional hockey brilliance. Let’s meet the contenders for this season’s crown:
Dignowity Gentrification
Captain: Andrew Minerd
From the trendy heart of gentrified Dignowity comes a team full of characters who are as unpredictable as the neighborhood’s housing prices. Andrew Minerd leads this eclectic crew, a mix of veterans, enigmas, and a couple of players who still don’t know the rules. Minerd’s leadership will be tested, especially with the likes of “Why Does Everyone Think This is My First Game Every Game?” Jason, whose perpetual rookie aura remains unmatched.
Old Man Foss is back for yet another season, ready to prove age is just a number (until the third period) – an interesting pick by Minerd for sure – if you can’t beat him (and he hasn’t), make him play for you. Augie, Popham, and DeGroff bring their unique styles of offense. Watch out for Kaleb Morley, who’s likely still in goal-scoring form after his heroics last season, and Matt Gilbert, who’s already been nominated as “Most Likely to Forget Which Rink We’re At.” Finally, Mike Mallery will attempt to out-strategize everyone, unless he’s too busy blaming his teammates for the outcome.
Key Question: Can Minerd keep this circus under control, or will the Gentrification collapse like a historic building turned coffee shop?
Southside Sicarios
Captain: Jaiden Hernandez
Jaiden Hernandez is out for redemption, leading a squad that mixes brawn, skill, and questionable attendance. Dubbed the Southside Sicarios, this team is here to put opponents to bed. Jaiden took a gamble on Brian van Vlymen who is expected to dazzle on the ice when he remembers his skates—or shows up at all.
Art and Dixon bring grit, though Art might be more focused on his intermission philosophical musings. Collin Iacarella remains the Sicarios’ offensive engine, while Ashton Baggett and Chris De Hoyos will provide a scoring punch to complement Collin. Erik Hillskemper rounds out the squad as the defense-first stalwart, ready to shut down opposing top lines. Finally, we have the Bullwinkle to Art’s Rocky in Ray Ortega.
Key Question: Will Jaiden’s newfound “winning streak energy” from last season translate to success, or will the Sicarios fall victim to Art and Ray’s bench antics?
Legendary Stoners
Captain: Junior Yupanqui
Junior Yupanqui captains the Legendary Stoners, a team destined to bring chaos, comedy, and the occasional goal. Junior, known for his explosive starts and third-period disappearing acts, will need to lead by example—or at least show up for all three periods. Brian Swatske, Ron Ylagan, and Ryan Lewis bring plenty of firepower and sliced oranges. They’re for the whole team, Junior!
David Narvaiz is still perfecting his “one-legged cat burying a turd on a frozen pond” defensive technique, and Rick Odom continues his SARHL legacy of almost scoring and not falling down. Zack “Did You Get My Assist?” Merullo is here to make sure no point goes unrecorded, while Will Newell and Glenn Domingo bring a mix of talent and unpredictability. We’ll let you decide which one is talent and which one is unpredictability.
Key Question: Can the Stoners channel their chaos into victories, or will they live up to their name and get lost in the haze?
Waste Management
Captain: Coach Penn
Helmed by the always strategic Captain Penn, Waste Management is a team that thrives on taking the league’s scraps and turning them into gold—or at least bronze. Penn’s squad is packed with personalities, starting with Micah Deary and Jacob Hernandez, who could form one of the deadliest offensive duos in the league— if and when they show up.
Ian Chase will be leaned on for both his defensive skill and his ability to fight off his recurring case of mange from last season. Kevin Shanahan, Ray Salvano, and Ricky Bobby bring speed and grit to the lineup, with Travis “My Beard is My Neckguard” Laveault providing veteran leadership (and, presumably, snacks hidden in his beard). Alex Casella rounds out the lineup, ready to prove he’s more than just another pretty face on a team of pretty faces.
Key Question: Can Penn’s strategic brilliance overcome the unpredictability of his roster, or will Waste Management live up to its name and stink up the rink?
Opening Night Matchups
8pm: Dignowity Gentrification vs. Southside Sicarios
Will Minerd’s Dignowity crew gentrify the rink with their creative chaos, or will Jaiden and the Sicarios enforce their Southside supremacy?
9pm: Legendary Stoners vs. Waste Management
Junior’s high-energy squad faces Penn’s disciplined misfits in what promises to be an entertaining late-night clash. Will the Stoners’ star power shine through, or will Waste Management clean house?
The SARHL season is officially underway, and Fairchild Park is ready for another season of goals, gaffes, and glory. Let the madness begin!
Quick Stats
Standings
| Team | W | L | OTL | Pts |
| Czechia | 4 | 1 | 0 | 8 |
| Italy | 2 | 1 | 2 | 6 |
| Russia | 2 | 4 | 0 | 4 |
p = President’s Trophy
* = Clinched Playoff Berth
e = Eliminated from Playoffs
League Leaders
| Player | Team | G | A | Pts |
| Ortega, R | Italy | 8 | 3 | 11 |
| Popham, B | Czechia | 5 | 5 | 10 |
| Narvaiz, D | Italy | 8 | 1 | 9 |
| Goalie | Team | W | GAA | SV% |
| Newton, T | Czechia | 4 | 3.75 | 0.847 |
| Artzberger, G | Russia | 2 | 4.17 | 0.824 |
| Rodriguez, F | Italy | 1 | 4.50 | 0.824 |
Minimum 1 games played
League News
Week 8 Recap
Game 1 Recap
The stage was set for the most important game of the season as the Stray Cats hosted the Tarantulas with first place on the line. What started as a dominant performance by the Cats turned into heartbreak, as the Tarantulas clawed their way back to steal a 6-5 victory and claim the top spot in the standings.
Final Score: Tarantulas 6, Stray Cats 5
Goal Scorers:
For the Stray Cats, goals came from Ian Chase, Micah Deary, Jacob Hernandez, Augie, and Brian Van Vlymen. The Tarantulas were led by a hat trick from Kaleb Morley, with additional goals from Zack Merullo, Collin Iacarella, and SARHL legend Chuck Gawell, who secured the game-winner.
Game Notes:
- Minerd Straps on the Pads: The Cats were without goalie Taylor Newton, forcing Captain Andrew Minerd into the crease. Minerd’s performance in net was admirable—good but not great—as a couple of goals slipped through that he’d certainly want back. His absence from defense and, most importantly, the bench left a leadership void that proved costly.
- The Cats’ Hot Start: Under interim “captain” Mike Mallery, the Cats roared out of the gates. A 3-1 lead in the first period, capped by an early second-period goal from Augie, made it look like the Cats were cruising toward victory.
- Penn Outcoaches Mallery: Enter Tarantulas captain Penn. With his team on the ropes, Penn adjusted his line matchups, and the move paid immediate dividends. The Cats were thrown completely off their rhythm as their commanding lead slowly disappeared. After the game, Mallery brushed off the outcoaching claims, saying it was more “lethargy” on his part. Whatever the reasoning, the result spoke for itself.
- Chuck Gawell’s Heroics: In a moment that could only happen in the SARHL, SARHL Hall of Fame inductee (class of 1957) Chuck Gawell delivered the dagger. A wild bounce off the concrete barrier left the Cats scrambling, and the veteran Gawell tucked in a wraparound goal for the game-winner, proving that age is just a number when you’ve got instincts as sharp as his.
What It Means:
With this win, the Tarantulas officially cemented first place in the standings and a ticket to the championship game—because let’s be honest, there’s not much left to sort out in a 3-team league. For the Stray Cats, this loss will sting, especially after such a promising start. While they’re still championship contenders, they’ll need to regroup and reassess heading into the final stretch.
For now, the Tarantulas get the last laugh, but as we’ve seen all season, anything can happen in the SARHL. Stay tuned as the drama continues to unfold!
Game 2 Recap
With little on the line but pride, the Stray Cats and River Sharks faced off in the night’s second game, where the Sharks stormed out of the gates and held on for a 7-6 victory.
Final Score: River Sharks 7, Stray Cats 6
Goal Scorers:
For the Stray Cats, goals came from Brandon Popham, Brian Van Vlymen, Jacob Hernandez (2), Mike Mallery, and Ian Chase. The Sharks’ offensive surge was led by Junior with a hat trick, De Hoyos with two goals, and Ryan Lewis and Jaiden Hernandez each chipping in one.
Game Notes:
- Sharks Swing Early: The River Sharks came out swinging, jumping to a quick 3-0 lead while the Cats seemed content to float. Mike Mallery, embracing his now-infamous “lethargic captain” role, opted for a hands-off approach, letting his team figure things out on their own. Spoiler: this approach didn’t work out in the end… again.
- Ian and Popham’s Blame Game: The Ian-Popham pairing was equal parts productive and problematic. The duo contributed to three goals—two for the Cats and one for the Sharks. Each blamed the other for the defensive breakdown, and the rest of the Cats bench could only shrug as they were all busy ogling Chris DeGroff’s collection of 1995 Fleer hockey cards he inexplicably brought to the bench with him.
- Junior Comes Alive (Finally): Junior, long criticized for disappearing in big moments and late in the game, flipped the script by starting strong and finishing late. After scoring the game’s first two goals, Junior completed the hat trick in style, burying the game-winner late in the third period. Now the Sharks just need him to show up like this in meaningful games.
- Jaiden Calls It a Streak: Post-game, Sharks captain Jaiden Hernandez was seen channeling his inner Lou Brown reminding everyone that his team has now won two straight with him in the lineup. “One more,” he joked, “and it’s called a winning streak. It has happened before.”
Overall:
The River Sharks are heating up just as the season nears its conclusion, and Jaiden’s crew is suddenly playing with confidence and without Art (not saying Art is the problem, but his absence during their wins is conspicuous, for sure). Meanwhile, the Stray Cats will need to hit the reset button after back-to-back losses and start looking ahead to the play-offs. This game may not have mattered in the standings, but it gave the Sharks something to celebrate—and reminded the Cats they still have work to do.
These two teams will meet again in game 1 of the play-offs with the winner moving on to the championship game versus the Tarantulas.
Sponsors
